What the future will bring,?
I really do not know, sometimes I think I will also know it is not always so real.
I know what I brought in the past and it may not stay that way, can not stay.
Ever give a long questionnaire, the doctors what they want to know everything. On so much I hardly have an answer, I am beginning to feel empty. And yet, there you are, the words.
Somehow they come anyway. Often I wonder how all this may well come? And actually, yes actually you are already there, the sought answers .. Yes now I know, I'm definitely borderline, what a word. It sounds like I should say, futuristic, but here it describes just a collection of behavioral patterns, parts of a fault which together form a whole, the borderline personality disorder. How was the stability of the instability? Actually, an elegant speech. But songwriter as well as beautiful? No, that certainly does not.
Few outsiders can really understand what your responsibilities as a human being on this feeling of emptiness, hatred, these doubts and strong feelings. The eternal change of extremes. How can you live there without going crazy? How to cope with the extremes in life, to love, to do things?
action and reaction is often so over the top violent, but incomprehensible to others .. for you not understand ... Thereupon, hated and shunned. What up just yet still further adrift.
you try you all a time, somehow .. Eventually, it is only too much, too much of the "not-good" to much of what you just pushes further into it, into a world where you just can not slip off. The
Search and longing for something all-encompassing, something fulfilling .. I wish I could have put it better that what I feel. Just put in any words, but words are too weak, too weak to express what is there.
alone this uncertainty, the very nature and image of opposite forces me often do not express what I think and feel. Up to the point where it just bursts out and then it comes as often as hard and take the one that should never take it because you are a few who are with me, are there for me no matter what was, what is what ever will be. And already hates you look a little more, longs morbid nature penalty. Doing things again you better not do the trick. But still it goes into a loop.
I much prefer to stay behind and watch just the life, but I'm lonely, alone and also a little strange that I've always been what I would like to mention here. But at some point you realize that indeed it is not good always to be only for himself and not even really for others ..
for it is so unreal, in everything.
What is still a reality in the end ..
