Racquel Darrian Strap

fundamental issues

Today I once again make an appointment with a psychologist ... somehow you will have been enough because only further acts at least Sun Well has in any case you are right. I see so also, but who wants to adapt itself much. My way of dealing with the world may not always be beneficial, but a yes man I will not be.

But do I need for well- my life and decide to learn to live with other people. For as it is, it can not remain. But what I want because really all that? If I only knew.

I want my car back and I wish so much a real work also fills me. Level, something that I do not just because I have to.

But this requires dealing with people. Something that I really hard. More than anything else. Now the only question, I want to live then? If so, how?

all too much, so many thoughts and no end.

How Towalk Up The Stairs With A Broken Leg

Dark Ages

These are a few photos, three to be exact, the hold of my current mental state is very beautiful in pixels. Check them out. Do you like the style of images you can put your good pleasure. For they are among the last recordings were not only these three.

Merilyn Sakova Vintage Forum

Emotional chaos

I realize that every time that I lost control of my psyche than I'd like to admit. All these feelings are not always useful, and actually unrealistic and stupid. I have a loving friend, we will even marry someday. And what do I do? Again I'm a very impressive young man somehow stupid like that. But it comes over a so suddenly. You just can not help it. And certainly not run away again and continue. But tell the truth, is both, not really. Because not everyone is so convinced of the pure truth as I do, but many do not prefer to know everything. But I think

Währe but it's time once again to provide clarity. I just do not know how. Especially now that finally some people want to spend time with us ... Since I can not but just go and say, "Hey ...... I'll find you the right class and you'd like to" better "want to know." You can not do?

Then I'll certainly get no answer. And such relations will split three I also never have to go ... Losses are simply dangerous, especially if not all honest. As "S." yes, it was not. No one is ever really honest, and certainly not to me. Sorry.

only what makes me feel this way? Again and again? Is this really an eternal search for something that I never had and never really going to do?

for love, as it was never and never will be?

total fulfillment, only without the bill with the "be normal" to have made of others.

I probably just need to learn and accept that you do not always get everything you want and it is certainly not the perfect man. Even if I wanted him so many times have. Actually that's not all here, too much sense, but it should also not good. In thinking further Währe really stupid because it's still all that sad, so what would be the same the next depression means. And I'm honest, I do not think more of that. I feel as soon as my head explodes. Drowning can not this feeling, because in the euphoric happiness intoxicated phase always follows the deep Absturtz. "What goes up, that must come down."

But even without alcohol's always been bad enough.

That's So now first of feelings, enthusiasms and all kinds of depressive emotional chaos.

Ariste Ring Scott Kay

tolerance and trust, which is still in this world?


I would like to once again write about my experiences in relation to my illness and what I heard from others and what has affected me deeply.

I'm even quite young. But life is not so beautiful. No more in the opposite. I'm not as how others of my age. That is exactly tobe, I am "sick", the mentally ill. Need to know exactly what the doctors themselves do not exactly correct diagnoses are rare but well. But for the whole time limit thing: to choose from diseases such as ADHD, borderline personality disorder and the Aspergersyndrom in so far as I could narrow already. I note that it also finds no really cares ... Even my parents never interested. No matter how many times I've really built my crap and I was noted suicidal behavior. My whole life I have destroyed poorly trained teachers and my parents naive ... And then the doctors, where people simply can not be trusted. The abuse your trust and violate their confidentiality due to 2 €. What then, prefer to go the lowest way of the resistance and fill you full of drugs or want an equal zwangseinweißen ... where it constitutes no danger to others but only one is telling the truth. And I'm not a single case, no Many have told me similar narios. I am also a case of a woman known who had mid-20s a nervous breakdown, now would be called the most burn-out syndrome, you dragged so long from institute to institute and was under medication that she now only a joke, a sad remnant a smart beautiful young woman. Today, mid-50s with nothing. I never want to end up, but I will be forced to yield to such methods, because one wants to "help" me so I promise I will not get any help even more.

But I do think, because what makes me so sick? I think and feel differently than most others? or at least what I much more to provide power, I have a variety of anxiety disorders? can

The underlying disease is so close to my personality fused the cure of which only the loss of my Persönlichket have to follow ... It frightens me No one understands only because no one listens to me, I'm nobody can give no credence to the need, for I am sick.

I may make only practical relief work because I am considered stupid ... yet I'm just forgetful! My IQ is 135 not 50 so I'm not stupid. Why then should I do with my life unless I can not even invest heavily in better education, which is a man of little money is not it?

They say I had nothing to profitable, but is allowed to me so no chance to show I can be useful precisely because of the disease.

Imagine to have had a thirst for knowledge equivalent to the one Faustchen quest, could not you sleep because you have to think about everything. That could never leave.

Does not it could also be useful to you? I mean, yes, but they give me and look at my own special way, things never get a chance. This happens to many, unfortunately.

I learned last night about a boy, 15 years young, ADHD. He was sent to a special school. But he is of no way stupid, no, just sick. In this interview, I knew only not how old he is. And honestly made no one noticed it on him.

redegewannt and Sun and expressive and understanding, so some 30 years does not create it. Actually, most do not.

the songwriter, but he will never have a normal life.

sedated and "treated"

never understood or accepted.

For The company of hiding and changed rather what is not like they want it. Because we are really that bad? No, I say. The people have only fear, for we have to tell the truth and not afraid to represent them. This is rarely influenced by us about our rules. That makes you fear.

And all this is then also completely legal? We are pumped full of drugs? But alas, we do drugs or something, then that's illegal. Although often similar substances? Sorry but I do not understand. Serving the public make us dependent but never leave us the choice.

I know well what these geselschaft left for Physically Disabled has. And now ask why we could not accept less?

I would appreciate any responses.

more related links and comments and of course some suitable quotes:

there "Hope Is Someone "by Antony and the Johnsons

" Oh I'm scared of the middle place, between light and nowhere, I do not want to be the one left in there, left in there "

" The Sorrows of Young Werther "Goethe

letter on August 12

" Human nature, I continued, has its limitations: it can tolerate joy, sorrow, pain, to a certain degree, and is destroyed as soon as it exceeded the . This is not the question whether one is weak or strong? but whether he can endure the measure of his suffering? It may be morally or physically: and I think it's just wonderful to say, man is a coward who commits suicide, as it would be impolite to call the a coward who dies of a malignant fever. [...] Well my friend let's apply this to the mind. Look at the people in its restricted nature, such as impressions affect him, ideas take root in him, until finally a growing passion for him bereft of all meaning power, and it is based richtet.Vergebens that the calm sensible man takes in the state of the accident, in vain, the He urged him! Just as a healthy person who stands at the bedside of the sick to him of his powers can not inspire the least. "

" size have the people who give others a chance "Unknown

Links: BPS in the Wiki

Aspergersyndrom in the Wiki

ADD and ADHD in the Wiki